


To Tumble Off The Precipice

by MitsubachiAria



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Byakuya doing Commoner Things tm, Coming to terms with being an abuse survivor, Danganronpa Characters Getting Therapy, I swear it's not as dark as these tags make it sound, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Makoto is his bemused guide, Naegami Month 2020, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, This is a Togami family hate group, Two Shot, at least not the whole way, mild acts of rebellion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:02:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28005843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MitsubachiAria/pseuds/MitsubachiAria
Summary: Byakuya comes to some uncomfortable truths about his past, and needs to decide how to face his future with them in mind. Also Makoto buys him a Baja Blast.
Relationships: Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya, very minor tokomaru
Comments: 6
Kudos: 48





	To Tumble Off The Precipice

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is turning out way different than I intended- first of all, it's gonna be in two parts because the tonality between the first and second part will be very different. First part is angst, second is fluff. Also, tw for discussions of abuse- I haven't read the light novels so I don't know how consistent this is with them, but it's how I interpret things, I guess. Plus like, it's an AU, so canon doesn't get the final word. Anyways, hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Also technically qualifies for day 10- jealousy- of Naegami month bc I posted part one 3 minutes before the end of the 10th yaaay

It all started when Byakuya shared a simple anecdote about his childhood during an idle conversation in the common room one night. Everyone was talking about the silly, mischievous things they did in their childhood- Aoi had framed her younger brother for eating the last donut so her parents would buy her another one, Chihiro had given their dad’s computer a virus to try and get him to stay home with him one day, things like that. Normally, he didn’t have much to contribute to such conversations, but a story did occur to him this time. So, he cleared his throat after Sakura reminisced about the time she accidentally broke a water pipe while training. 

“Um, I do have a similar story that I can think of,” he said, feeling a strange sensation of unease. “If you don’t mind me contributing, of course.”

“Wow, Mister Perfect acted out as a kid?” Sayaka questioned, bemused. “By all means, we’d love to hear the story.”

“It’s not quite as exciting as all of yours,” he mused. “I read a book that mentioned the characters eating hamburgers once, and they were described to sound very good. But, my father thought they were unbecoming of a Togami to have, so the chefs wouldn’t prepare one for me. I bribed one of the maids to buy one for me, and had I been a bit more careful, perhaps I would have gotten away with that too, but another overheard me and told my father. I was forbidden from eating the whole next day, of course, and that maid was fired for agreeing to take my bribe, but now that I’ve had them at school, I don’t think hamburgers were really worth all that trouble.”

The rest of his classmates stared at him blankly instead of reacting with laughter like they normally did to such stories. “W-was that not the right sort of story?” he asked, fighting the urge to shrink away at these strange looks. “If so, I apologize-”

Mondo cut him off before he could justify himself. “You know that’s really fucked up, right? Like, that’s seriously fucked up.”

“Pardon? I mean, I probably should have known it might jeopardize the woman’s job, but-”

“No, that your dad punished you like that!” Makoto exclaimed. The fiery passion in his eyes let Byakuya know that he’d seriously unnerved him, and everyone else for that matter. “Who would starve a kid just for wanting to try a new food? That’s horrible! I’m so sorry you went through that!”

The others reacted in similar horror. Everyone was asking if that was a frequent punishment, or if anything worse happened. He could only stare blankly himself in response. “I-is that abnormal-?”

It was Mukuro, of all people, who stood up and hugged him. He felt something strange in his chest, like he’d gulped down ice water, but he accepted the hug. “Byakuya… Take it from me, those aren’t the kinds of people you want to stay in your life. Please, if nothing else, talk to a professional about this.”

“Kinds of- people? I don’t entirely gather what you mean,” he admitted, the normal confidence replaced with a numb shock. “What do you mean?”

“That your dad’s an abusive shithead,” Leon said curtly. 

Abusive-? He’d heard those accusations thrown around before, but always by enemies or former employees. But, hearing them from people he considered to be his peers, or even his friends, that felt very different. Was that right? Togamis weren’t supposed to be victims of anything, and yet… perhaps he was a victim of the very family he was trying to uphold.

“I need a moment, I will excuse myself,” Byakuya said, standing up and finding himself running back to his room. Taka didn’t even bother to tell him off for running in the halls, instead looking at him with an expression of pity. 

Pity… god, he hated being pitied. That’s what everyone was doing, pitying him. But… was his situation truly pitiable? He wondered this as he laid on his bed and watched the spinning of the ceiling fan. A child, terrified of his own father’s wrath. That was the textbook example of abuse, was it not? And, as someone who studied the human condition to better understand it, it wasn’t as if he were blind to the condition of abuse.

He’d simply been blind to his own condition. The life he led was envied by many, but looking back, he started to feel a profound hollowness in his chest. Had he been able to simply reminisce about his parents laughing off something he pulled, or simply grounding him, no one would have looked at him like that. No… that wasn’t the issue. Their concern wasn’t something that upset him, his ire stemmed from that it would upset the Togami family, for their golden son to be looked at with the uneasy smiles reserved for the suffering of commoners.

Perhaps his problem was with the Togami family too. He’d excused so much of their behavior on the grounds that it was simply how things are conducted, but clearly, it was not. Was “exceptionality” truly worth putting up with that kind of pain for? All his life, he’d lived under the assumption it was, but now, he felt he almost craved the relaxed life that he’d always been told was worse than death. 

He envied his classmates. That was the issue. And, it felt as if he could have what they had with a simple act, easier than anything. If he were simply to stop acting as a Togami, it would all be over. He could just leave- god knows he wouldn’t be the first to do so. 

The other option would be for him to endure this, to wait until it was his turn to be in charge, and abolish the hurtful cycle. But, that could take decades, until he was able to do it, and even if he could, by the time he ascended, would there even be enough of this doubt left to change things? Should he even want to change it, or simply accept things as they were? Should he quash that doubt once more?

Regardless of his own feelings, he made an appointment with Miss Gekkogahara, thinking she would likely know more about the specificity of abuse than himself, considering she was the school’s therapist. And, she was similarly horrified as his classmates had been. Textbook abusive behavior, she said, with his father surrounded by enablers. She suggested many different routes of dealing with it- cutting his father off, or stone wall-ing any attempts of his to communicate and keeping their relationship as distant as possible, and things of that sort. 

And so, he was left on the precipice once more. Did he want to forsake his family name for his own sanity, or press on and either accept it or change it? This was the kind of decision he had to make on his own, and yet, he felt daunted by it. His talent was the Ultimate Affluent Progeny- if he rebuked that, there wouldn’t be a place at this school for him anymore, surely. But, the longer he stayed here, the more his talent stopped being a badge of pride and felt more like an ill fitting tie, strangling him slowly. 

He noticed occasional kind smiles from his classmates, but was unsure how to take them. He knew they meant well, but he feared he couldn’t reach out his hand without all of his conflicted emotions bleeding out through his eyes. So, he just tried to make himself scarce, staying in his room between classes and therapy sessions. 

But, one day, he heard a knock at his door. For a moment, he supposed it might be Toko, but he hadn’t seen much of her since she began becoming so close to Makoto’s sister. So, it was more likely someone else. He opened the door hesitantly, finding himself unable to quite look Makoto in the eyes once he realized it was him. “Good evening, do you need something?”

“That’s what I was going to ask you,” Makoto explained. “You’ve been really distant since that whole conversation about your dad, and everyone’s really worried about you!”

“I’ve been speaking to Miss Gekkogahara, if that is your concern,” he assured him. “It’s no big deal-”

Makoto shook his head, cutting him off. “That’s not what I meant, and you know that. I’m really proud of you for going to therapy, but, you don’t need to bear this alone. That’s what friends are for, right? You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to, but I want you to know you aren’t alone, and if you need anything at all, just tell me!”

He smiled, just a tad. “Thank you. And… maybe there’s something.” He had a request in mind that he’d need another’s help to do, but could he really ask Makoto for this? It was a lot to ask, and might be dangerous, and most importantly, was embarrassing. But, it was crucial for figuring out the answer to his burning question, of whether it would be better to be a commoner than a Togami. 

“I want to experience a day as a normal teenager,” he said, forcing himself to look Makoto in the eyes. “If I am having doubts that the path I choose is the right one, I want to know what the other path would feel like. Perhaps it is selfish of me to have doubts, considering how many would want my position, but-”

“You don’t have to justify yourself to me,” Makoto assured him with a warm smile. “I’ll definitely help you! Tomorrow, we can go to some regular stores and see a movie or something! Do you want to invite anyone else?”

“No, I would rather no one recognize me, so as few people who know about this, the better,” Byakuya asserted. “Preferably, use some sort of false name for me while we are out so no one knows I am a Togami. I will still handle all expenses, though- my bank account is secure, so my parents will not be able to see transactions on my card.” 

“Won’t people see your name on your card, though?” Makoto questioned. 

A very good point! He was a bit embarrassed to have not thought of that. “You have a good point! I’ll withdraw the money and use cash, then. Thank you, Makoto.”

“Oh, it’s no problem!” Makoto assured him. “Honestly, it’ll be fun to show you the kinds of things I enjoy doing as a ‘commoner’ and all! Oh- do you have any casual clothes? If not, you can borrow some of mine. They might be a bit big on you, but they’ll be comfortable, I’m sure!” 

Another good point- Makoto was certainly the right person to entrust with this task. “Yes, thank you. I will very much appreciate that,” he assured him. “As for the rest of the disguise, probably not wearing my glasses and styling my hair differently will be enough, but to be safe, I’ll apply makeup so my features look more androgynous.”

“That’s a good idea!” Makoto agreed. “Your hair is pretty distinctive though, there aren’t a lot of blonds around here. Maybe do you need some temporary hair dye?”

“Temporary hair dye is rarely so temporary,” Byakuya mused. “I’ll simply live with the odd hair color, most would assume it’s dyed, anyhow, and that’s not terribly uncommon for high school students.”

“You got any food allergies?” Makoto asked suddenly. “Just trying to figure out where I should take you.”

Byakuya shook his head. “None, no. A pollen allergy, but that shouldn’t interfere with culinary plans. I will gladly go along with anywhere you so please.”

“Got it! No problem! I’ll pick you up around nine tomorrow and we can take the metro to a good place to shop and stuff!” Makoto’s eyes were shimmering with excitement. It was almost reassuring to see someone’s eyes so brightly shining for himself and his own selfish plans. 

But, once Makoto left, a sinking dread settled over Byakuya. He’d made a split decision to do something unprecedented for himself. Was it worth it? He hugged a pillow close as his stomach started writhing in unease. An act of defiance to either satiate his curiosity or lead him off the precipice… whatever became of it, tomorrow would certainly be very important. 


End file.
